Creamy cauliflower soup

Now, generally my meals are quite healthy. However, it is impossible to make a good cauliflower soup without using roux, a truly unholy blend of white flour, butter, and milk. The good news? You can get away with using just a tiny bit and if you want to up the creamy richness later, you can stir in some plain yogurt. (Of course, if you're feeling particularly naughty, you can always use sour cream.)

A good cauliflower soup also needs...

cauliflower! Grab a few - or more! - heads and roughly chop. Put 2/3 in the pot and steam the rest. We're going to puree the steamed cauliflower. Pureeing some of the cauliflower will make the soup seem creamier, which reduces the need to resort to something like, well, cream to make it creamy and rich.

Chop up some celery. I prefer smaller chunks. Use as much as you want. Toss in pot.

This is what happens when a piece of celery hits the floor and you are using a slow shutter speed. Actually, I don't even think the speed was that slow - Coco is just that fast when it comes to food.

I wish she picked up "don't pee on the bathmat even though it is sorta kinda fuzzy like the grass you're supposed to pee on" with the same speed.

Back to the soup. Same goes for the carrots. I used 2-3lbs carrots for a soup using 8 good-sized heads of cauliflower. I grated half of them, got bored, and diced the rest. Toss in pot.

Onions: dice, toss. Please do not skimp on the onions! If cooking for people who claim to dislike onions, just puree. They will never know.

Fill that pot either with chicken stock, veggie stock, water, or a water/stock mix. I make my own base using water, Bragg's, and a little fresh lemon juice. I can't see beef stock working here, especially as we'll be adding in plenty of dry white wine later. Personally, I don't use stock for most of my soups. I get tons of flavor from herbs, spices, and garlic, and most stocks add too much salt. But if you prefer stock, go right ahead!

Let the veggies simmer. Then go pull out a small pot or saucepan for the roux. Toss in one stick of real butter - not the "smart" butter with olive oil - and let it melt using a lower heat.

When the is butter melted, pour in 2 cups milk.

I use real, skim milk, though any real milk will do. Please do not use almond or soy milk. Thank you.

Go pull out some white flour.

After the flour incident, I've taken to storing my flour in glass jars.
(5lbs of flour licked into a cloth couch taught me that much.)

Stir 6 tablespoons flour into the milk/butter liquid using a whisk and low heat. Turn off and set aside. Now, that is a fair amount of roux. I used this amount of roux for 2+ gallons of soup; most recipes instruct to use this same amount for a much smaller batch (4-8 servings, depending on the cookbook.) If you're unsure how much roux you want in your soup - and bear in mind you will need some - stir in a little at a time. It's rich stuff!

As an aside...it is vitally important that you first melt the butter, then add the milk, and then add the flour only when the butter is melted and the milk/butter mixture is nice and warm. If you do it all at once, you will end up with this:

Ick.

Not too icky for the dogs, though. When I cook, I have a special dog pot into which goes veggie ends and anything that fell on the floor...and just a little solid roux.

I told Coco that yappy little minpins go into the soup pot, too.

Now, go peel some garlic - lots of it. Or find all this pre-peeled garlic at your flea market for $1. Whatever floats your boat. I recommend the flea market way. Do not skimp on the garlic!

I think I should rename this blog "do not skimp on the garlic!"

Save some for just before serving, too.

Remember the cauliflower that we set aside to be steamed and then pureed? Go puree that cauliflower with the garlic. You will need to add in about 1/3 of the roux so the food processor can do its job. Pour that wonderful blend of cauliflower, garlic, and roux into the soup.

Now, the wine. I love to cook with wine.

Sometimes, I even put it in the food.

I sent a friend out for a bottle of Chardonnay. She returned with a magnum of Pinot Grigio. Either is fine - just use a dry white, please. Add to taste. Even if you're making a batch as large as I am, you do not need anywhere near an entire magnum of wine. Goodness gracious. For a standard batch, 4-6 servings, use about a cup.

Now, while all that is simmering, let me tell you about this beer since we're already on the topic of alcohol.

Or at least I am.

Golden Monkey by Victory.

I was at dinner with a friend last week and he ordered a bottle of this. It came in a small glass and I joked that our waitress decided he couldn't handle, you know, a full bottle. As it turns out, Philadelphia is not allowed to serve a full bottle of Golden Monkey due to its absurdly high - nearly 10% - alcohol content. That aside, it has a wonderfully spicy finish and I - usually not a beer-drinker - give it my wholehearted endorsement. The problem is that all the spice totally masks the high alcohol content...so be careful. After all, most of us don't check the alcohol content before imbibing. Beware the Golden Monkey!

Hic.

The friend who came over for dinner, who picked up the Pinot Grigio, also picked up some Golden Monkey...which may or may not have resulted in one of my guests fishing out Coco's white eyelet dress and doing this:

Where were we?

Oh. Yes. Soup. Back to that.

Go add in at least some parsley and black pepper. I also add in a healthy amount of Bragg's and a little oregano. If you used stock, be very sure to taste before adding anything salty; most canned stock has lots of sodium. If you're tasting and tasting and can't figure out what it needs, consider adding in more pressed garlic or Bragg's (or soy sauce, or salt.) I generally add in a healthy amount of freshly pressed raw garlic right towards the end. Gives it a little extra somethin' somethin'.

The somethin' somethin' makes all the difference.

This is what you will have at the end. It is so good. It is everything a soup should be: rich and chunky and creamy and flavorful and fresh and comforting and savory and soothing and...and...just perfect. It makes me swoon.